Gummy Relapse

            Hi again! Let’s begin with a progress report on my transition from vegan to paleo. It has been both challenging and rewarding at the same time. Challenging because I am used to eating whatever I wanted. Prior to my the big change I was putting together Easter eggs for my munchkins and at the same time giving in to every temptation from gummy warms to Twix oh and so much more. I didn’t feel like it was really effecting me until I gave it all up. Ok, in all honesty I have had some relapse moments most notably was earlier this week. My husband and I have a deal, whenever one of us is going to be out for dinner, whether for work or social reasons, that the other gets to do whatever the kids wanted for dinner…usually that is some kind of take out or delivery option. So as normal my husband was attending a work function while I stayed home with the kids studying for a midterm and attempting to read through approx. 60 pages to prepare myself for class the next day. I asked the kids what they wanted it, emphasizing that they could have ANYTHING they wanted tonight…”PIZZA!” was the general consensus among them. Because I was busy and distracted I didn’t think twice, it was easy, fast, and I did not have to stop what I was doing.

            I am proud of the fact that I have made it a point to provide my kids with a homemade meal almost every day of the week cooked by myself or my husband. The occasional take out is something that didn’t really happen very often when we were trying paleo before lent. But nonetheless, I went ahead and called the local pizza place and got a medium pepperoni pizza and some hot wings (ß my lame attempt at lazy paleo). Just so we are clear while eating chicken is part of the paleo lifestyle, eating fried chicken is not! So we ate the pizza on their craft table because that is what they wanted to do tonight, my son had two bites and didn’t care for the rest all he wanted was the carrots that came with my wings. My daughter on the other hand enjoyed her pizza but was not impressed; like I said they have a keen sense of taste and pizza just doesn’t do it for them. To the point, ordering pizza that night spiraled into a lot of bad decisions, I ate pizza, I ate wings, and I ate gummy worms. This was bad on all levels, I had horrible dreams, my stomach was experiencing what I can only describe as WAR, and all in all I felt awful.

            I tried to analyze what happened based on how I felt before and after, I tend to do this a lot because I like to pretend like I understand how all things work within my body. Prior to eating my first bite of pizza I didn’t have a single sugar craving for the past 2 weeks. After my first slice all I could think about is sugar, and more pizza, I wanted SUGAR as if it was a drug, it was all I could think about, I couldn’t focus, concentrate or function. I managed just enough resistance to put my kids to sleep, who by the way also had a rough night, waking up at least 2 times each during the night. I ate the gummy worms immediately after, I felt as though my head was going to explode, my sensations were so out of whack I didn’t really know what to do to begin salvaging my mistakes.

            Sugar is fully responsible for my wired and weird trip. But why? According to Ferris Jabr, “By consuming so much sugar we are not just demonstrating weak willpower and indulging our sweet tooth—we are in fact poisoning ourselves according to a group of doctors, nutritionists and biologists, one of the most prominent members of which is Robert Lustig of the University of California, San Francisco, famous for his viral YouTube video “Sugar: The Bitter Truth.”” (Jabr). We are literally giving in to what is widely known and accepted as an addictive stimulant (Jacob). And if my goal is to reach wellness and control, eating something that is addictive such as sugar I am willingly giving up control. I did, I fell in to the temptation. I know what you are thinking, why even have gummy bears at my house? Well, after I put together some eggs for Easter, I meant to throw away whatever was left over, yet I got busy and so did my husband, and we didn’t get a chance to dump the junk.

            I learned that night that I am not as strong as I thought I was, at least not as strong as I want to be. I also learned firsthand what sugar and bad eating choices will make you feel like. It messed with every aspect of myself, from concentration, to body image, and sleep. Can sugar really have that kind of effect on me?

According to David Sack, M.D. “Sugar can cause blurry vision, difficulty thinking and fatigue, all of which may be interpreted as signs of a panic attack…” Furthermore, “Sugar may also compromise cognitive abilities such as learning and memory. In an animal study by the University of California Los Angeles, six weeks of taking a fructose solution (similar to soda) caused the rats to forget their way out of a maze, whereas rats that ate a nutritious diet and those that consumed a high-fructose diet that also included omega-3 fatty acids found their way out faster. The high sugar diet caused insulin resistance, which in turn damaged communications between brain cells that fuel learning and memory formation” (Sack).     

            So not only did sugar make me anxious it made my studying even harder. I have no doubt that there is more to it than that, however, I know how I felt, and it was not good. The paleo lifestyle has taught me a few things when it comes to sugar and bad choices. I learned that mistakes are inevitable and that they are part of the definition of success. What do I consider success, well I am not sure yet, all I know is that I am far from it. I still have cabinets of snacks that I offer my kids and I still crave a piece of bread here or there. But that is ok, I am ok with that. Kids need much more carbohydrates than adults in order to function, that’s exactly what my pediatrician told me when I voiced some concerns about my children’s eating habits. I know that saying no to myself or my kids is not the right approach. I know that I need to teach them to make decisions for themselves and be the example of what good decisions are.

            My daughter Anna, came home last week with fennel leaves and round green balls in her pocket and when I asked her what it was she proudly said “It is fennel mom, I took it from our school garden during our playtime; the teacher told me I could have it because I liked it and I also ate the peas.” I am not sure what the peas are for all I know they could be ANYTHING, I am content with believing that they were at the least edible. So my husband and I decided to grill some fennel for her so she can try it…she was not a fan, but she didn’t hate it either.

Parenting will always be a learning process for me and her and my son Jake. However, I do know one thing for sure, if I think I know all that I need to know I would never have smelt a fennel leaf or tried a mysterious pea. I am content with knowing that I know close to nothing when it comes to all the beautiful array of colors and scents and textures at my local produce store. And that is an adventure I am excited to take with Anna and Jake. We made a pact that every time we go to the farmer market we will get something that we have never tried. As Anna says “A princess has to try everything!”

The paleo lifestyle has really helped me take control of my body, especially when it comes to resisting unhealthy urges; ok it’s still a working progress. It has also taught me that instead of saying no, look for an alternative. Instead of having sugar in my coffee in the morning I have coconut sugar, planet based and natural. And instead of having sugary frozen waffles for breakfast, make my own frozen waffles with apple and bananas as my main ingredients. I have thoroughly enjoyed the challenges of recreating some family favorites and seeing my kids prefer natural over processed. Overall, I would say week two was a success for the most part.

                                                            Work Cited

Jabr, Ferris. "Is Sugar Really Toxic? Sifting through the Evidence | Brainwaves, Scientific

            American Blog Network." Scientific American Global RSS. Scientific American, 15

            July 2013. Web. 01 May 2014.

Sack, David. "4 Ways Sugar Could Be Harming Your Mental Health."Psychology Today:

             Health, Help, Happiness + Find a Therapist. N.p., 3 Sept. 2013. Web. 01 May 2014.

Jacob, Aglaée. "Paleo Diet: Sugar and Fructose." Paleo Diet: Sugar and Fructose. Eat-

real-food-paleodietitian.com, n.d. Web. 01 May 2014.